growing up

As the kids grow up, they have an increased awareness about cause and effect. By that I mean that they know the exact scenarios in which they will get into trouble and how to avoid them. They’re obviously not very sophisticated at the art of avoiding trouble but I’m certain this skill will be swiftly acquired in the months to come.

It used to be that when they did something they weren’t supposed to do, like raid my skincare drawer and squeeze out all the contents of my expensive eye cream, I would walk in to catch them red-handed engaging in said act of mischief.

These days, they seem to sense my approaching presence and will try to hide all evidence of their shenanigans.

Like yesterday, I noticed that Tru was taking an awfully long time doing his business in the toilet, so I decided to check it out. Just before I got there, he came running out to greet me, with a look of guilt plastered all over his face. That was like a dead giveaway and I was all “what did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything,” he shook his head unconvincingly.

“Mommy, come here, you need to wear pants for me,” he said while pulling me in the opposite direction of the toilet, still looking extremely guilty. I wasn’t falling for it because HELLO, I’M YOUR MOTHER AND THE MASTER OF MISDIRECTION. I wrote the manual on the art of distraction and I know every trick in the book.

I got to the toilet and lo and behold, the entire roll of toilet paper was stuffed into the toilet bowl and it was so full that it was spilling out in all directions. In the grand scheme of things, this wasn’t a big deal as compared to say, pouring water on my laptop. It was just annoying because it was perfectly good 3-ply super soft toilet paper that could have been used more constructively.

Instead of making him face the wall to ponder the many legitimate uses of toilet paper, I figured this was a good time to teach a far more important lesson. By now, they generally know when they’re doing something bad, else they wouldn’t need to hide it. What we need to teach now is not to cover it up.

We made a deal, that if he did something bad and confessed to it immediately, he wouldn’t get into trouble. On his part, he wasn’t supposed to hide it or lie about it. And on our part, we’re not supposed to naughty corner him. We could go on a 45-minute lecture explanation on why the bad thing they did was so bad, but no punishments.

I’ve come to terms with the fact that they’re kids and I don’t expect them to be perfect. But I’d definitely want them to fess up when they’re in trouble so we can figure out a way to rectify it together.

My mom was cleaning out her house recently and she found this.

That photo of me and my brother was taken 26 years ago (incidentally, our age gap is also 13 months).

And this is Tru and Kirsten now. Ok seriously, even the hair is exactly the same. Clones attack!

I don’t usually talk about stuff like this but it’s something worth telling so here it is.

Ever since Tru started school, I make it a point to spend my mornings doing fun stuff with Kirsten. Stuff that makes her smile. Those 3 hours are our girly time and I guard it religiously. That means I try not to spend it with her strapped into the car seat while I drive all around town dropping cheques and picking up dry cleaning.

huh... errands again?!

Remember when Tru was hospitalized last month? I left my iPhone charger in the hospital and when I went back the next day, they told me that somebody found it but it got chucked somewhere and lost again.

So today, I figured I’d clear all my errands and swing by to pick it up at the same time. Already feeling bummed that baby girl would be spending the better part of her morning in the car seat, we sprinted up to the ward to do a grab-and-go. Except that it had mysteriously disappeared again and I was told that I would have to make a third trip down.

Under normal circumstances, this would have been the point where I made the poor nurse very sorry she took the shift where the crazy chick went ballistic. And if she had been rude or snappy, I probably would have raised hell like she had never seen before.

Only she wasn’t.

She was nice. She smiled. She said she was really sorry and she looked genuinely appalled that I would have to go back a third time. She also spent 10 minutes rummaging through every drawer she could find. Then she fussed over baby girl, gave her a lollipop and asked if she could hold her for a while.

Today could have been the day that we wasted running around in a frenzy. But instead, it was the day we met a nice lady who gave Kirsten her first piece of candy.

Sometimes, we need to be reminded that a little niceness goes a long way. Spread a little love, will you?