I hate herpes. (Not that kind of herpes – I don’t have it.) The one I’ve got is called herpes simplex and there’s a BIG DIFFERENCE from its STD cousin, in case you’re wondering. Still, I hate it with a passion. It’s a curse I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
It’s a condition that comes whenever I’m under tremendous stress or suffering from a lack of sleep or ill. So in short, it attacks me at my most vulnerable moments. Bloodsuckers. It shows up like a cold sore on my upper lip, and it hurts like hell. Why do they have to give it a name like herpes anyway? Might as well call it syphilis or gonorrhea or VD.
I was at the doctor’s trying to get some medication for the cold sore (I had no idea what it was called back then).
Doctor: What seems to be troubling you?
Me: I’ve got this cold sore like thing on my lip that really hurts.
He examines it for a moment.
Doctor: Not to worry, it’s a mild case of herpes simplex. I’ll prescribe you a cream to apply and it should clear within a couple of days.
Me: It’s a mild case of WHAT?
Doctor: Herpes Simplex. Incidentally, there’s no cure for it. The cream causes it to be in remission and it’ll come back from time to time.
Me: AWESOME. (that’s irony, by the way)
Doctor: And it’s also contagious, so be careful not to spread it around.
Me: It’s turning out to be the best day of my life. I’ve got a highly infectious, incurable disease that derives its name from an STD. I’m so not worried.
That was 8 years ago and it comes back to haunt me once or twice a year just to catch up on old times.
So this morning I woke up to a familiar sensation in my lip and lo and behold, it was good old herps. I’ve been up till all sorts of unearthly hours this week rushing some work and watching Man Utd get demolished, which is probably the cause of it. Now I’ve got to go around having well-meaning people comment on my condition and then trying to explain to them that I don’t actually have an STD.
I’m too depressed for words right now.
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Daph,
I do get the same cold sore condition too.. I got it when I was in UK.
So you’re not alone.
you should clarify that its “oral herpes” and not the “other type”.
Wait, that may not help…
I’ve gotten cold sores since I was a little kid. Don’t worry about it, you aren’t alone. Although, I have to admit that like you, mine always show up when I am my most stressed. What the fuck?
I feel much better since it’s such a common condition. Misery loves company. My husband seems immune to it though… 8 years and he hasn’t gotten it once. Life is too unfair.
Awww. My husband has it as well – has had it since childhood. It has a truly gross name here that I will spare you. :-) Just tell people they’re called stress kisses.
.-= When Did I Become My Mom´s last blog ..It’s all in your head… =-.