All Posts By

Daphne

from around here

36 is where it’s at

36 years and this is the best birthday I’ve ever had.

So there’s the part where I’m 36 and I feel like I’m supposed to be bummed about being on the wrong side of 30, but if anything, this feels like the right side of 30.

//

The night before, the kids were delivering me very specific instructions on what I was supposed to do on my birthday. “You’re not allowed to get up early, you need to sleep in and we’ll make you breakfast in bed ok?

I already liked what I was hearing because sleeping in is one of my very special skills. “That sounds exactly like my kind of morning, tell me more!!” I said.

You can place your breakfast order tonight and the rest of it will be a surprise!” they told me excitedly.

I did as they instructed and slept in till it felt like almost too much. Haha, kidding, there’s no such thing as too much sleep but there was a lot of loud whispering and shushing and commotion outside so I decided to get up and skip right to part 2 of my surprise. Which was a welcome party with full on red carpet treatment for someone still in her pyjamas. They popped confetti and yelled “HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMM!!” before presenting me with breakfast and handmade cards and flowers and group hugged me with all the enthusiasm in the world.

The rest of the day was just as perfect – had lunch with my folks, got more hugs from my babies (so many hugs!!), ate cake, and then we capped off the night with Bruno Mars and like 7,000 other people.

The kids asked me what I wished for on my birthday and I thought really hard but I couldn’t think of a single thing because I look around me and it’s all here. Everything that I’ve ever wanted in my life is here.

I know, I’ve really lucked out big time.

//

I’ve really enjoyed being in my 30s. I don’t know why people talk about 30s like it’s somehow inferior to being a 20-something.

I’ll tell you right now, 20s are overrated. A lot of my 20s was spent figuring out who I was and trying so hard to get comfortable in my own skin.

You’re the only one who can be you, so don’t try to be anyone else,” they said, and I tried to embrace it because it all sounds very empowering in theory but for many years, I could never shake off the feeling that maybe being just me wasn’t the best thing to be. I mean, how could it when this other person seemed to be having a much better life? Or look at that person who’s smarter and wittier and more beautiful and generally more awesome. I couldn’t see how the best version of me would be better than a knock off version of someone else. I felt unsure about a lot of things a lot of the time.

It took a long time and a lot of work but sometime in my 30s, I finally got to a place where I’m happy being just me, and I can’t tell you how liberating that feels.

There’s also the part about just being better at stuff in your 30s. After making all the mistakes I’ve made and spending all those years learning the things that life makes you learn, I now get to spend less time being afraid that I’m not doing it right or not being good enough.

I’m really liking how 36 looks; I think I’m going to just soak it in for a bit.

from around here

A collection of things

I know I haven’t been entirely consistent with this blogging thing because life these days has me up to my eyeballs but I’ve grown to be very fond of this space here so I think I’ll try to stick around for a little bit.

To make up for my very poor effort in terms of consistency, I shall bring you an assortment of delightful things on this fine day.

One.

I gravitate towards humour and I’m very pleased that the big kids share my appreciation for different kinds of humour. *Perhaps here is where I should mention that I try my best to teach them important life lessons and make every moment a teachable moment so that they become excellent specimens of the human species but full disclosure, I usually only manage to keep that up for like a minute or so; it’s exhausting. I much prefer spending my time telling them about the things that made me laugh that day and they seem to enjoy it.

Last week, they came home looking very excited and proceeded to tell me a couple of yo momma jokes that really made my day.

Kirsten: Yo momma so fat, when she gets on the elevator, it ONLY GOES DOWN!!

Tru; Mom, how about this one? Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her at Christmas and it’s still printing.

I told them right there that I’ve got the best kids in the world.

Two.

All that rain lately has put the kids in a mood for fort-building. They’ve always enjoyed building forts but there’s nothing like a massive thunderstorm and four other siblings to really get you feeling like you need to drag out all your blankets and hide underneath them together.

I discovered that I’m also a huge fan of this activity because at one point, I couldn’t find them anywhere in the house and all 5 of them were snuggled up in their fort whispering secret stories.

I was all “Okay that looks amazing, carry on! No, GET BACK INTO YOUR FORT, you guys should stay there for at least 3 more stories, maybe 20.

It turned out to be a very lovely afternoon for everyone involved.

Three.

What did I ever do to deserve these girls??

Sometimes I ask myself the same question about the boys too, like when they’re climbing all over the seats + random elderly ladies on the bus (there are always elderly ladies on buses at 10 in the morning and I have apologised to many of them), although clearly these are very different questions.

Sigh, I adore my 3 boys but I’ll never understand why they do the things they do. I suspect they don’t understand it either.

Girls though. Girls, I get. We enjoy our little bonding sessions and quality time and snuggly moments and I’ll forever be grateful to have these two girls in my life.

Hayley

Just what the doctor ordered

As you can imagine, having 5 small humans in one house is a recipe for things to go viral pretty frequently. And by things, I’m referring to actual viruses, the kind that are accompanied by sniffly noses and too-warm babies.

So who’s lost the battle with a nasty flu bug this time?

This little Hayley bunny.

Poor baby just got out of KKH for a bad stomach bug last month and now this but you know what’s the one good thing about sniffly babies? They are the babiest babies of all. And you know that’s exactly how I like my babies. Babies who can’t wait to grow up are ok I guess but babies who are all baby and all out milking it? My heart doesn’t know how to resist that.

Wait a moment, this is starting to sound like my masochistic subconscious acting up and being all “I’ve been enjoying all this delicious uninterrupted sleep for far too long, let’s see how we can set that straight…oooh feverish baby for a few nights? Exactly what the doctor ordered!“, which might be a little bit of what’s happening here but its mostly just me enjoying all the extra cuddle time with this baby. Right now, I’m at the point in my life where I’ll take cuddle time any way I can get it. At 2 in the morning? I’m down with that. At 3.3oam for the third night in a row? I’m all in.

To be clear, if I could choose between a fluish baby or a non-fluish baby, it would 100% be the non-fluish baby every single time. I’m not sure what it says about me that I have to clarify this but umm yeah, here we are.

My point is that I’ve been around babies enough to know that the flu happens and yes, the baby will become a clingy, needy tyrant covered with an extra dose of grumps sauce. But all that misery comes with a silver lining and you bet I’m hanging on to that silver lining for as long as I can.

The flu usually shows up with a drippy nose followed by a fever and then comes the cough. We’ve weathered the first two but this cough, it’s been the worst. It’s the kind that sends her into a breathless fit until she’s struggling for air in between coughs.

Hayley vomit,” she says with tears.

It’s a cough, baby. I know it’s bad but you’ll feel better soon okay?

Look at these sad baby eyes. Sad baby eyes needs extra hugs and me! me!! I’ll volunteer my baby hugging services.

Today, I had this baby lie on my chest for hours because this is the most comforting place for her to be. For me too. My arm is dead and my shoulder is twitching involuntarily but I’ve missed feeling this warm baby weight on my chest so much. When you hold a baby for long enough, your chest gets all warm and toasty in the most incredible way possible; I highly recommend it.

I tried to put her down when she fell asleep but she instinctively wrapped both arms tighter around my neck and I was like “you know what, baby? They’re gonna have to pry you from my cold dead hands because mommy will hold you for all of eternity. Or until you feel better in a few days. Most probably the second one.

Hopefully this baby will turn the corner tomorrow but while I get to still feel her arms wrapped too tightly around me, I’m going to enjoy that too.