It’s a party of 5

party of 5

I’ve got news, y’all!

Yes, it’s happening. We are having a baby. Another baby. A fifth baby. I can confirm that this baby oven is fired up for one last babycake.

You’ve probably got questions and I’m here to answer all of them, Q&A style.


Are you completely insane?


No, seriously, WHY?? 

I know, we’re out of control. 5 kids!! This is borderline obnoxious territory. The short answer is that we really, really like babies.

About 80% of the time, I look at our 4 kids and I think, “WHAT HAVE WE DONE?? This is madness.” But then the other 20% of the time, I look at them and I think, “they’re ridiculously adorable, we should go for one more.” You know what they say about the 80-20 rule – the 20% always wins.

Also, it’s a gut thing. 5 feels right for us.

Are you really done? Or will there be #6?? #7???

Oh I’m done. So done. This factory has done it’s job, it’s time to shut it down.

I distinctly remember you saying this with the last baby. 

That is true. You should know by now that when it comes to babies, I cannot be taken seriously. I don’t have a good track record in this particular area. All it takes is for me to hold one cute baby and all bets are off.

But again, 5 feels complete for us. Besides, this body isn’t getting any younger and I don’t think I can make it through a sixth pregnancy.

Is it a boy or a girl?

This baby has to be a girl. I can feel it. I NEED A GIRL.

I can’t be the mom of 4 boys. I’m not mentally prepared for another boy at this point so just work with me here.

Have you decided on a name?

I briefly considered Chanel. Just so that I can call her Chanel #5.

Sadly, the husband did not seem to find it as amusing as I did, so that’s a no to Chanel Kao. Hahahahaha.

Hayley is still the frontrunner, with Riley and Harper following close behind.

How are the other kids taking it?

They’re actually really thrilled. I think a by product of having parents who are obsessed with babies is that the kids pick up on our baby mania instincts. They’re great at handling babies and if they had a say in this, they’d want me to have another 5 more babies. The answer to that is no, by the way.

When we broke the news to them a few weeks ago, they squealed and spontaneously broke out into a crazy dance around the room. They’ve since been taking turns to sing to the baby and tell her bedtime stories.

Like I said, these are the 20% ridiculously adorable moments that cause my lapse in judgement when it comes to making more babies.

How’s pregnancy coming along?

It’s week 10, so not great. 5 pregnancies and all of them were truly awful during the first trimester. I feel ill most of the time, until I get these massive cravings for a mcspicy and fries, but then once i eat it, I feel immense self-loathing and way more ill than I started out and I eventually end up with my face in the toilet bowl vomiting my insides out.

But with the benefit of experience, it’s easier to buckle down and ride it out till it gets better.

Is there a plan to cope with 5?

Not at this point, no. The plan is to wake up everyday and get past that day, and then the next, and the next, and the next. I fully expect the mayhem to escalate and we’ll all have to make adjustments but the kids (especially Truett and Kirsten) have really stepped up and I’m so glad to have them in my corner.

Kirsten seems to have it all worked out though.

“Easy,” she said, “I’ll be in charge of the girl’s team with baby Hayley and kor kor will be in charge of the boy’s team with Finn and Theo.”

Sounds like a pretty solid plan to me.

Final thoughts?

We’re so happy to be having this baby. I don’t for a single day take this for granted, to have these amazing kids in my life. I’m grateful for each baby that God has given to us and we take this privilege very seriously, to love them and be there for them and give them a shot at being the kind of people God planned for them to be.

We can’t wait to meet this little one. :)


Best bros forever

This is going to be a quick one and I’m putting it here in the category of things I need to write down before too much time passes and I forget it ever happened.

I like that the kids can sometimes still surprise me with moments that make parenting such a delight.


It was kind of a rough day for Truett, who was sent to his room after a series of rather serious behavioural infractions. The last one had involved some shoving and pettiness, so I had a very stern word with him, removed all his privileges for a week and sent him to the room for 20 minutes to calm down and think about it while I went to sort out the rest of the kids in what is known as our usual Post-Dinner Mayhem.

Finn came out from his shower, saw his big brother sobbing quietly in the corner of his room and went over to sit down next to him, bare naked bottom and all. I was about to make him put on some clothes first, but he put one tiny arm around Tru’s shoulder and said, “It’s ok kor kor, it’s just me, Finn Kao.”

He’s never had to comfort anyone before and I think he didn’t know what else to say so that’s all he said several times. “It’s ok, it’s just me, Finn Kao Kai Feng.”

And then they just sat in silence together for a long time, one naked baby gently patting his sobbing big brother on the shoulder.

It was like that scene from Inside Out where Sadness just sat with Bing Bong until he felt better, except one had no clothes and the other cried real tears instead of candy.  And because sometimes when you’re really sad, all you need is someone to sit there beside you.

After several minutes, Finn came to me and whispered, “can you give kor kor one more chance because he’s very super sad…”

I’m supposed to stick to my guns and be a firm disciplinarian and all but I have like zero resolve in the face of such moments.

Well played, boys.

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Paris with Finn + Theo

Yeah, so turns out that it’s true, Paris really is ridiculously beautiful. Very much so.

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From London’s St Pancras train station, we boarded the Eurostar on a 2.5 hour ride to Gare Du Nord in Paris. If you’re planning to travel on the Eurostar, I discovered that the earlier you book this, the cheaper it is. I priced the trip at about £40 several months back but I dawdled on it and when I finally made the booking a week prior to leaving, it was more than double. Urgh. So book fast once your dates are set.

Other than the fact that Theo spent most of the ride either yelling for food, eating the food or looking displeased that there was no more food, it all went rather well.

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We spent most of our time in Paris exploring the cobbled streets of the city, walking from Notre Dame Cathedral to Pont Des Arts, to the Pantheon, circling around for lunch at Latin Quarters, down to the Louvre, to Champs Elysees and then back to the Eiffel Tower, where our apartment was.

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finn paris-2

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It was a lot of ground to cover but I liked how being in Paris felt like a walk in the park. None of the madness of Oxford Circus, no shoving or jostling or getting tsked for slowing down and taking a knee because Finn wanted to look at squirrels.

We’d take the time to explore gorgeous Parisian bookstores like this one.

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We’d take time to run after birds or sit by the pavement on a bridge to listen to this guy singing a most soulful french number.

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Oh oh here’s a story of the bridge – I was snapping some photos of Finn, who was dutifully flashing his blue steel face for the camera. There was a Japanese girl next to us who squealed something about kawaii when she saw him, and then not-so-discreetly snapped a photo as well. I typically don’t mind strangers taking photos of the kids when they’re squealy kawaii Japanese girls but Finn immediately flashed her a deadly side stare, upon which she decided to make a quick getaway.

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Blue steel does not mess around.

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We managed to spend some time at the Louvre, which was a fabulous way to spend an afternoon. Even baby Theo had a great time pretending like he was a work of art.


How much for the interactive masterpiece hanging by the railing? Priceless. I’d take this one any day.

theo louvre-2

And the Eiffel tower? Quite breathtaking, especially at night.

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I feel like I need to spend some more time with this city at some point, but for a first visit, it was everything I hoped it would be. Plus a little bit more. :)